//* sheer happiness in the million little things.

Sunday, April 30, 2006

11:11 PM

come stop your crying

it will be all right

just take my hand
hold it tight

i will protect you from all around you

i will be here

don't you cry

for one so small

you seem so strong

my arms will hold you

keep you safe and warm

this bond between us can't be broken

i will be here don't you cry

'cos you'll be in my heart

from this day on

now and forever more

you'll be in my heart

no matter what they say

you'll be here in my heart, always

why can't they understand the way we feel

they just don't trust what they can't explain

i know we're different but deep inside us

we're not that different at all

'cos you'll be in my heart

yes, you'll be in my heart

from this day on

now and forever more

don't listen to them

'cos what do they know

we need each other, to have and to hold

they'll see in time, i know

when destiny calls you

you must be strong

i may not be with you

but you got to hold on

they'll see in time, i know

we'll show them together

'cos you'll be in my heart

believe me, you'll be in my heart

i'll be there from this day on

now and forever

you'll be here in my heart

no matter what they say

i'll be with you

you'll be here in my heart, always

i'll be there always

just look over your shoulder

i'll be there always.

i guess i should just be grateful
for our friendship.
be grateful for all that ever happened.
i'm happy for everything.
i'm grateful for your friendship.

for always being there for me,

friends till the end.

yes, friends.

i wouldn't want to waste it.

you probably mean too much to me.

yeah.

friends till the end.

my vow to you.

but i just want you to know,

that through it all,

...you're just the best i ever had...

remember me this way//*

Saturday, April 29, 2006

10:22 PM

god will make a way

where there seems to be no way
he works in ways we cannot see

he will make a way for me

he will be my guide

hold me closely to his side

with love and strength

for each new day

he will make a way

he will make a way.

i'm here patiently waiting

for my rainbow.

and you better not

leave me here alone!

i'm in a know-where-i'm-heading,

don't-know-what-i'm-getting

kind of mood.

random.

'ilu.

remember me this way//*

Friday, April 28, 2006

8:45 PM

today was one of

the crappiest days ever.

everything that could go wrong

went wrong.

it was horrible.

i miss mr low.

a106 is falling apart without him.

come back from tibet!

we miss youuu.

sigh.

wasn't very into colosseum.

just cheered for a few people

that i knew.

spent most of my time

talking to willie, leonard,

lucien and royce.

hung around with nat.

sigh.

i hope you're fine.

don't think so much alright?

it's over.

you did well

and everyone could see that.

i'm still real proud of you anyhow.

don't let this mistake

kill your drive and spirit.

i'm still believing.

take care.

((:

remember me this way//*

Thursday, April 27, 2006

9:17 PM

by the way,

i hate you.

for now, at least.

darned.

f-ed up.

ffffreak.

and my knee hurts darn bad.

sheat lah.

god heal it please.

please please pleaseee.

it's getting too painful.

sigh.

maybe i should hate less.

oh wells.

darned.

remember me this way//*

9:01 PM

lost to nj.

shall officially start studying

after pj's game next wednesday.

no more netball.

just study, study, and more study.

have been waaaayyyy behind

in school work.

all i ever do is copy tutorials.

damn.

so dumb.

hope lisa's fine.

please take care babe.

rest well and get well soon.

will be praying.

sigh.

they played come what may

during second period break today

for some song dedication thing

that the ava club set up.

my whole class was just singing away.

05a106 is love. ((:

never knew i could feel like this

like i've never seen the sky before

want to vanish inside your kiss

everyday i love you more and more

listen to my heart, can you hear it sing

telling me to give you everything

seasons may change winter to spring

but i love you until the end of time

come what may, come what may

i will love you until my dying day

suddenly the world seems such a perfect place

suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace

suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste

it all revolves around you

and there's no mountain too high

no river too wide

sing out this song

and i'll be there by your side

storm clouds may gather and stars may collide

but i love you until the end of time.

...do you remember?

remember me this way//*

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

8:52 PM

went aaaaallllll the way

to kallang netball centre

and it rained cats and dogs.

makes you wonder

how that phrase came about eh?

anyways...

it rained real terribly.

lightning, thunder and all.

pretty freaky.

so both the 3.20 and 4.40 matches

were postponed.

we're playing tomorrow

at hwa chong at 4pm.

nj's game.

sigh.

realised nj beat pj 50-20.

and aj beat pj 61-17.

what does that mean?!

omg.

rather freaky.

guess we'll just have

to play our best tomorrow.

hwa chong has an indoor court.

slippery?

oh wells.

we'll see.

got to beat nj for any chance

to be in the second round.

...wish me luck...

remember me this way//*

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

3:53 PM

got sent home from school.

darn!

had this temperature taking exercise

and i was hoooottt.

38 degrees.

and the next time i took,

38.1 degrees.

darned.

had to go to the general office

to retake my temperature

and they sent me home.

crapped up.

sheat.

had to call dad.

he wasn't too happy,

knowing that the tournaments

contributed to it.

oh wells.

went home, slept,

and i just woke up.

the temperature's gone down.

37.5 degrees.

i hope i'll be fine for

tomorrow's game.

sigh.

god grant me strength.

and everything reminds

me of you.

remember me this way//*

Monday, April 24, 2006

9:03 PM

we won.

nyjc.

real close.

ain't really proud of it.

but i felt i played better

than aj's game.

that was atrocious.

nj's next.

wish me luck.

rained real heavily today.

got caught in the rain.

my jiao lian rocks.

she is love!

i miss her.

saw peng and val at knc.

i miss st hilda's netball

soooooo much.

sigh.

sweet sweet memories.

it's been real cold.

and the rain's making me sick.

i think i'm coming down

with the flu of some sorts.

i don't feel too good.

darned.

i feel horrible, in fact.

have been feeling real crappy

for the past few days.

i think staying home sucks.

'cos it makes me think.

and i hate it when that happens.

think far too deep.

damn.

i feel like i'm screwing up my life

one day at a time.

day by day,

more and more screwed up.

f all this.

f my life.

...i'm going to fail

unemployment tomorrow.

damn.

see. one more screwed up thing.

brilliant.

do you need anybody?

i need somebody to love.

could it be anybody?

i want somebody to love.

remember me this way//*

Sunday, April 23, 2006

7:32 PM

i was reading brother van's blog

and i came across this.

must be written by some stoopid guy.

ps: i must say a big thank you to

brother van for helping me just now.

brother is love. (:

but... stoopid men.

"it is so cruel.

why can't anime girls be real?

they are so perfectly drawn and

always do what you want them to do.

no gossiping, no mood swings.

just a perfectly drawn body.

you have got to love

the lonely japanese men who sit around

drawing these women all day.

some of the girls i know in real life

are really screwed up.

i know this one girl

who is just ridiculously ugly.

it is insane!

i only just realised the other day.

funny, i'm at the age where

i'm supposed to be realising

how beautiful girls are.

but instead i keep seeing

these freakshows.

i dislike those girls

who are heaps ugly and fat

so they have to make up for it

by being loud mouthed hags.

this is why anime girls rocks..."

f men.

remember me this way//*

3:32 PM

i hate you.

and this time i mean it.

...i think.

darn!

i don't know anymore.

sheat.

i need to study.

help me, please.

remember me this way//*

Saturday, April 22, 2006

10:09 PM

being home alone sucks.

but surprisingly,

i studied.

for possibly the first time in my life.

i did discrete random variables

and binomial distribution.

in hopes of getting a decent pass

for monday's lecture test.

haven't touched probability though.

darn math!

urgh!

i realised i'll be missing

math and mr low's paper 8 tutorials

on monday

'cos i've got to leave early for my game.

oooooh la la.

this is ultra cool.

hahahaha!

but but but...

i'll be missing ms k's tutorial

next wednesday!

urgh!

hate it!

ms k like totally rocks lah.

wasted.

dang! ):

i hate this lah.

hate everything that's going on now.

i desperately need

to get my life back on track.

i'm thinking of how i can

study yet have the time of my life

at the same time.

do things work that way anymore?

sigh.

teach me to be strong

on this road i'm travelling on.

i know you know

we've had some good times

now they have their own hiding place.

i can promise you tomorrow

but i can't buy back yesterday.

remember me this way//*

1:53 PM

life's just so boring.

i have concluded that

being at home sucks big time.

there's just nothing to do.

urgh.

somebody save me from this boredom!

)):

remember me this way//*

Friday, April 21, 2006

9:06 PM

aj's game today.

we sucked.

got thrashed.

...don't ask...

i don't know what's wrong you know.

it's like, the team's just screwed up.

no sense of urgency

both on and off court.

our basics barely exist.

we lack stamina.

and i feel that we lack one huge thing:

fighting spirit.

it's not offensive or anything, really.

it's just what i feel.

and i feel that we deserve a chance

to prove ourselves, to ourselves.

i honestly believe that we can do it.

but there's just too much to work on

and too little time.

get over and done with mj netball.

i'm counting down

to the day i'll stand down.

sigh.

i just feel so horrible.

but i'm glad i saw my st hilda's coach!

she is missed!

had a wonderful

and looooong chat with her.

i miss extremes.

i want to go back to play!

play good netball. (:

oh. and ms k rocks a106's world!

yummy cookies.

ooooh la la.

ms k is love.

and congrats to zhiyu!

he got third for his finals!

super proud of him.

you deserve it.

keep up that faith. :))

remember me this way//*

Thursday, April 20, 2006

8:45 PM

today was crap.

the pathetic fallacy: the rain.

darn.

but things got better towards the end.

lisa's a food pervert.

she'll do anything for food.

to drool at the kuehs at bengawan solo.

omg!

bolz is a beach ball today.

(if you can read between the lines.)

...until she decided to go see earrings!

and got us both into trouble.

brilliant!

aj's game tomorrow.

rather kan chiong.

don't know how

we're going to pull through.

but we'll try...

...i hope.

i shall shoot before we leave school.

the a'divs are here!

fight like champions!

((:

...do you miss what might have been?

remember me this way//*

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

9:02 PM

let it go, let it be.

let it go.

i only wish it were that easy.

to let you go.

'cos i have no idea

what to do anymore.

don't know how you make me

happy and sad.

don't know how you can do it

without even realising it...

if only i knew

what's going through your mind.

...if only you knew.

remember me this way//*

7:45 PM

I HATE MY DAD!

dad sucks! period.

went ship-ping today.

did my french national service.

stupid thing.

wasted my whoooole afternoon.

but i made new friends.

laura's a very very pretty girl. (:

have got to shoot tomorrow.

i feel like a let down to the team.

i'm sorryyy.

sigh.

can life can any worse?!

CRAP! :(

remember me this way//*

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

7:00 PM

you suck.

and i'm giving up.

someone save me

from all this mess.

get my life back on track.

i still hope that

that someone

will be you...

remember me this way//*

Monday, April 17, 2006

10:07 PM

happy blessed eighteenth

JEREMY!

you're a wonderful strawb! (:

the a'div fixtures are out!

...for those who care...

21 april (friday): ajc at 4.40pm

24 april (monday): nyjc at 3.20pm

26 april (wednesday): njc at 3.20pm

3 may (wednesday): pjc at 3.20pm

second round

doesn't look promising.

although we'll fight.

can't wait to see my coach

on friday during the aj match!

I MISS EXTREMES!

...darn the knee...

i got new slippers!

pink and black.

they are love. ((:

remember me this way//*

Sunday, April 16, 2006

6:21 PM

the pathetic fallacy.

and i don't have honey water!

boo! )':

remember me this way//*

Saturday, April 15, 2006

9:27 PM

do you remember

the time we used to spend

doing what we used to do back then

but the only thing

that's different now

you won't admit your love

that's if you love me again

every time i close my eyes

the visions reappear

and when i wake up you're not near

could you fall in love with me again?

'cos all i see is you

every time i close my eyes

when you look at me

i wish that you were mine once again

'cos now i love you

more than i did then

and i'm hoping

that we can mend it all back

'cos when we're together

the spark is there

and the flame comes back

should i say this to you

and just let it go

tell you what i feel

and just let it show

no matter how hard

that i think this through

my feelings are the same

i'm in love with you

'cos all i see is you

every time I close my eyes

there are a thousand reasons

why i should give up.

but i'm stubborn in the things i believe.

...truth is, i never got over you...

remember me this way//*

Friday, April 14, 2006

11:16 PM

so just give me one good reason

tell me why i should stay

'cos i don't want to waste another moment

in saying things we never meant to say

and i take it just a little bit

i hold my breath and count to ten

i've been waiting for a chance to let you in

i wonder if you realise i've been waiting

'till i see it in your eyes

so i whisper in the dark

hoping you'll hear me

do you hear me?

if only you knew...

remember me this way//*

2:48 PM

mus shared a motivation song

yesterday with the class

during econs tutorial;

move along by the all american rejects.

move along

go ahead as you waste your days with thinking

when you fall everyone sins

another day and you've had your fill of sinking

with the life held in your

hands are shaking cold

these hands are meant to hold

speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
move along, move along like i know you do

and even when your hope is gone

move along, move along just to make it through

move along, move along

so a day when you've lost yourself completely

could be a night when your life ends

such a heart that will lead you to deceiving

all the pain held in your

hands are shaking cold

your hands are mine to hold

i guess he's right.

we all have to move along,

no matter what stops us.

be it the horrible block tests,

defeats from competitions,

or just days that leave you sad all over.

move along and know that

your hands are mine to hold.

just like you held mine.

remember me this way//*

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

5:52 PM

bones is my source of entertainment.

i love bones.

and the yam seng gang.

jc's not that boring after all...

not yet anyways.

... probably in a week or two's time

when the tests start driving us up the wall.

in the mean time,

FUN! :)

remember me this way//*

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

10:20 PM

eighteen

thank you to everyone

who has made a

difference in my life.

blessing after blessing.

god sure is good.

for all the lovely friends.

for all the sweet sweet memories.

for all the tears.

for all the laughter.

for all the smiles.

for all the years that we've shared.

i love my mini cooper!

you make me happy

and you made my day.

thanks again.

zhiyu is love. ((:

remember me this way//*

Thursday, April 06, 2006

10:35 PM

i feel like a little girl

trying to conquer the whole wide world

everybody wants a piece of me

and i just don't know where to turn

i've got work piled up to my head

all i want to do is jump into bed

and wash away my troubles

with lemonade

play hide and seek

with the boy next door

take a trip to singapore and

imagine how i'll make the world

a better place

all i need is a good disguise

one where nobody can recognise

that i'm feeling so small

all i need is a secret weapon

i've gotta have faith

zapping monsters into outer space

i'm gonna be a superhero

if i were a little girl

trying to clean up the whole wide world

i'd kick the bad boys back to school

teach them fighting's just not cool

i'd give every kid a teddy bear

turn starving people into millionaires

break glass ceilings with dynamite

sprinkle a little sugar and spice

turn the bullies that terrorize

into pink poodles that bark

but don't bite

little superhero girl

save me from myself

save me from myself

a little superhero girl.

helppp.

remember me this way//*

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

9:05 PM

i don't know what

i live for anymore.

no more purpose.

no more direction.

no more life, almost.

sigh.

life sucks.

i don't like this. ):

remember me this way//*

Monday, April 03, 2006

9:28 PM

when just one person

kills your passion for the game.

i hate it.

four more weeks.

and i'm done.

done with all this crap.

... i hope.

anyways, orange is for luck. (:

hello panda's yummy food.

thanks for everything.

school sucks.

i hate everything.

i hate studies.

how am i ever ever ever

going to wake up from this sheat.

sigh.

so many questions

i need an answer.

is true love just once in a lifetime?

someday you'll know

that i was the one for you.

if i could ask god just one question

why aren't you here with me tonight?

life's so confusing...

remember me this way//*

Saturday, April 01, 2006

9:27 PM

baby listen to me

if i have the chance

i'd say those words

the bluest of blue

that's what her eyes are

that's what i am today

and if i had to do

it all over again

i wouldn't have waited so long

to say

i can't live without you

i don't want nobody else

baby, listen very closely

i love you

i couldn't lie

she couldn't wait

i love you came too late

i'd give my life

for yesterday

i love you came too late

i should have seen the signs

and paid more attention

but i pushed your love away

so if you find someone

to give you what you needed

somebody else not afraid to say

i can't live without you

don't want nobody else

my heart is in my hand

i took a good look at myself

if i had another chance

i'd shout it out to the world

i love you!

how appropriate;

i love you came too late.

life's so brilliant

when it's just you and me.

stayed over at johan's house.

played cards till four in the morning.

i'm tireddd.

i want to play mahjong sooooooon!

HAHAHA!

what happened to the studying plan?!

goooood question.

hahahaha.

by the way,

screw the block tests.

eof.

tsk.

remember me this way//*

theGIRL.
vanessa
hotelier
twenty-one
11 april
aries
ecole hôtelière de lausanne

currently in: singapore

sheLOVES.
god
mjc.05a106
family
netball
friends
sports
kemsters
goodstuffs
shss.netballers
shss.4a'04
orange
purple
lime green
mini coopers
fireworks
sunsets
the beach
mahjong
london cabs
passion
life

thePAST.
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
August 2008
November 2008
December 2008

herDREAMS.
#1 ~~ecole hôtelière de lausanne.~~
#2 custody.
#3 ~~play division one netball.~~
#4 hotel manager.
#5 a healed knee.
#6 ~~sweet friends.~~
#7 ~~good grades.~~
#8 happy family.
#9 ~~driving license.~~
#10 speak fluent french.
#11 ~~mini~~ cooper.
#12 ~~nice watch.~~
#13 ~~functioning computer.~~
#14 drive to thailand.
#15 decorate my room.
#16 travel the world.
#17 ~~sweet memories.~~
#18 ~~true love.~~